04.08.2016

Only A Woman

5 relatable feelings of the fierce and female

Words: Danielle Theron | Illustrations: Kobie Nieuwoudt

While many of us will simply enjoy the 9 August as a day off, there are even more of us who'll feel confused about why putting everything in pink or telling women to ‘look like a girl, act like a lady, think like a man and work like a boss’ seem to misguided brands like the way to celebrate Women's Day. After all, there's no one way to be a woman, and there's certainly no right way – but somewhere in between relaxation and rage, there are these highly relatable moments. Because only a woman knows the feeling.

Taking your bra off at the end of the day

As women we often squeeze into uncomfortable clothing for the sake of looking good. Hands up, I’m guilty of this all too often. However, after a long day where you’ve endured many constricting hours in another item of clothing that is deemed essential, nothing, but nothing, beats the moment you walk into your apartment and can finally free your bossoms from their captor. The sweet relief is like no other, and unclipping that little devil is like the opening of the pearly gates whilst Evanescense’s ‘Bring Me Back to Life’ is sung by a choir of angels. And no, taking off your pants is so not the same.

The power of the perfect shoe

Listen, the best thing about shoes is the fact that they not only have the power to complete or transform an entire outfit, but that no matter how much your weight fluctuates your trusty size 7s will ALWAYS fit you. And it’s when strutting your stuff in a pair of fire shoes that you finally start to understand why Carrie Bradshaw bought Manolo Blahniks instead of food - because they fed her more. The feeling of purchasing the ultimate power shoe is very close to euphoria. This coming from a girl who has hyperventilated over a shoe before, and subsequently slept in them for three consecutive nights because THEY ARE BEAUTIFUL AND MAKE STRONG MEN CRY IN TRAIN STATIONS!

The healing properties of the humble bath

I consider myself something of a bath guru. Anyone who knows me, or follows me on the gram, can vouch for this. And it is with full conviction that I preach the gospel of the healing powers of the humble bath. My mother always said “My child, there’s nothing a little soap and water can’t fix.” And this is the truth. Slipping into a Lush bath bomb-fuelled paradise with candles lit is the best form of therapy. Not only is it incredibly relaxing, it’s also good for your soul, and you will emerge calmer than ever and literally melt into your bed, post soak. Remember that you should never bath in artificial light - candles are the only way to go – and you’ll get extra points if you pop your laptop on the toilet seat and queue your favourite series on VLC for a little bath series marathon. Come on, showers are for after the gym and rinsing off at the beach, only a bath can help you release your inner Cleopatra.

The importance of quality wine/whine time with friends

Like a bath, a good gab session with your friends is another form of inexpensive therapy crucial to a gal’s survival. I say inexpensive and not free because you’re going to have to buy at least one bottle of wine. Whoever has honoured me with her company for a small libation will find herself in a safe space to share all her neuroses, deepest secrets, craziest thoughts and all the feelings. Cheesy snacks go great with gossip, but it’s imperative that you have enough wine if you want to get to the real talk.

Nailing that fire selfie

I know, I know, there are always going to be folks who try and knock you down for taking too many selfies. I should know, I’ve felt that burn all too often. But as Kevin Gnapoor in Mean Girls said, “Don’t let the haters stop you from doing your thing.” Nailing a fire selfie is something that not only boosts your self esteem, but also promotes a little self love. Yes I’m about to go real deep now… In a society where we are taught to hate ourselves, our bodies, even our damn nail beds, why not celebrate who you are and feel yourself a little? Surely there are worse things a girl can do? So, find your angles, catch the light, and TAKE ANOTHER SELFIE, GURL.